Learning English

Drew and Owen have been cracking me up lately with the crazy things they say. I need to do better at writing things down as they say them, because I've already forgotten most of their phraseology.

They've also been sort of driving me crazy; they bicker so much! But a lot of the funny things they say come out during their quarrels. Here's the latest instance:

Me: Who scattered my papers everywhere?

Drew: Owen did it.

Owen: Drew did it.

Drew: Owen did.

Owen: Drew! I don't did! You did!

***

Owen: [at 6:20 p.m.] I'm just gonna lay down.

Me: I don't want you falling asleep.

Owen: Yes. I'm are gonna fall asleep. Okay, guys?

I'm drawing a huge blank as far as their other funny phrases go; too much dust in my brain from cleaning the garage today. But I'll type some more as I remember them, some other time.

Maybe You'd Rather Not Know

Here's what's been keeping me busy lately:

I was wiping my kitchen counters the other day when I noticed the edges of my stove looking a little bit grungy. I thought to myself, "Self, you haven't cleaned behind the stove in a while (like, since you moved into this house three years ago); wonder what it looks like back there?"

Yikes. It turned into a huge time-sucking project, but after it was all clean the kitchen felt brighter. I found that strange considering the spaces under and behind the stove are hidden--you know, behind the stove...

Left: Before. Ew! These are what the stove look like in most of the apartments I clean.*

Right: After. Much better!

Left: Before. Where did all this stuff come from? I found two Chapsticks, an AA-battery (that still works!), and three plastic baby spoons.**

Right: After. I didn't realize the grout in my kitchen used to be lighter. I think it's a cement sort of grout. Under the stove it's still a light grey, but on the main-traffic area of the floor it's pretty dark. I scrubbed the floor (Cinderella style: on my hands and knees with a brush and bucket of suds) and couldn't get the grout any lighter so I guess it's stuck that way.

*Mostly just in the apartments of married people. In the bachelor apartments the stove and oven are almost always very clean. Not because they clean them better when they move out, but because they never used them to begin with.

**I had been wondering where those spoons went. I bought eight and was down to three. It's a pity I didn't find any sippy cup lids; for some strange reason I have fifteen cups and four lids. And I feel like I've looked every where. Haven't looked behind the fridge, though, which is going to be my next big project.

Which Car Would You Rather Drive?

Party Pictures

Just wanted to relive the excitement since nothing else is going on here.

We got Samantha this cute little skirt at the outlet mall in Boise last week. We appreciate that she's at that age when we can get her clothes for her birthday and she doesn't care.

We also got her this little doll that she loves. If you squeeze the doll's feet it shakes and giggles. The only thing is, Drew likes it a lot too. Samantha has learned that if she squawks at him, he'll give her toys back to her.

Owen had a lot of fun helping Samantha open her presents. Samantha didn't even care; she was just happy her brothers were paying attention to her.

Samantha loves this duck that her adopted grandparents (David's best friend's parents) gave her.

Samantha's cake was a ton of fun to make. I made the flower petals out of Starbursts (rolled 'em flat and cut them into petal shapes); the flower centers are Junior Mints; the lady bugs are squished-up Dots with black frosting piped on for the spots and the heads. I wish I'd had more vanilla frosting. I always think I can frost a two-layer cake with just one can, but it never works out that way. It's just not enough frosting. I had a can of chocolate frosting so I threw that on the sides. It was tasty, but the cake would have looked better all white.

I made a cupcake for Samantha to have and put two lady bugs on it.

Drew helped Samantha blow out her candle.

Left: "Mmm! This is Delicious!" Right: "Hey! I'm not done with that yet!"


Kitchen sinks work best for First Birthday Clean Up.

My Baby's Birthday

Samantha turned 1 yesterday! The last year has been a roller coaster ride of snuggles and spit-up, playtime and poopy diapers, cooing and crying, crawling and crabbiness--and a bunch of other alliterative antipodes that I can't think of at the moment.

It's been so great! Samantha has really completed our family. She has such a great personality and has been a great balancing figure around our household.

The past year took us from this

To this.


From this


To this.

From this (sorry it's dark)

To this.

Happy Birthday, Samantha! We love you!

I'll Never Get Botox

We had a good soccer game today. Won one to zip! Our team actually played better than usual, too--at least, for the first half. We passed the ball (and even though not all the passes went where they were supposed to, the attempts were important because they were wearing the other team down) and we communicated with each other on the field. Good and important things that we don't usually do, but that always make a difference when we do.

The second half of the game didn't go as well for us. While we didn't let the other team score, we didn't put any points on the board either, and passing and talking sort of went out the window.

The last two minutes of the game were the worst for me. I was going toward the ball on defense. The other team's forward was also going toward the ball. I pulled up and meant to kick the ball between his legs, but he didn't pull up. Rather, he came at me full speed with his elbows up, slammed me in the face and knocked me to the ground. I landed flat on my back, but my legs flew threw the air so I did a sort of side-roll sommersault thing. I got up really quickly, and the guy asked, "Are you okay?" I was pretty ticked, but I said, "Yeah, I'm fine." I meant to keep playing because we had no girl subs, but my eyes were watering like crazy and my nose started running. I figured it was probably bleeding (it was) so I took myself out of the game and sat down. On my way off the field I heard one of the guys on my team yell at the other kid, "Aren't you going to say sorry?" To which the other kid replied, "She said she was okay." As if that made it all better. After the game was over one of the kids on my team walked over to the other player and said, "We're going to have a big problem if you don't go apologize to my teammate." It's nice to be part of a team.

My nose bled for about ten minutes and my lip was all swollen (the swelling has gone down quite a bit as I type this five hours later). I'm pretty sure I'll never get lip injections; I don't like the way it looks:

I don't like how my nose looks puffy on the left side (the right side in the picture), either.

A Turn For The Weirder!

Something has changed at our house in the last few days. I don't know what it is, but I want to figure it out so I can try to change it back. Drew and Owen have been driving me absolutely crazy lately. (Not like that's anything new, but it's been worse than usual the last week or so.)
Drew had actually been behaving better for a while; he'd been saying "please" and "thank you," and had been quite obedient. Owen has always been naturally polite and obedient, with only a few meltdowns here and there.
Suddenly, both boys are constantly bickering with each other, and throwing fits when I tell them to do something.
Take this morning for instance: David called me from work just as we were finishing up breakfast. I went to check the stock reports on the computer for him, and when I got back upstairs the boys had finished eating and were riding around the kitchen on their Wiggle Riders. Owen had cleared his bowl without being told. Drew's bowl was still on the table so I told him, "Drew. Please take your bowl to the sink." He flipped out, started yelling and running around. I told him to go to his room which brought on the wailing and gnashing of teeth. He crashed his Rider into Owen, so I grabbed him and dragged him to his room. I closed the door behind me and waited for about two minutes for the tantrum to die down. When Drew settled down, I went in and talked to him about why I sent him to his room. I thought our little chat took care of the problem, but I was mistaken. Drew went back into the kitchen and proceeded to not take his bowl to the sink, so I told him to go back to his room. He spent the next half-hour there, because it was apparently more pleasant than taking one little bowl to the sink. Eventually, he took the bowl, but I don't know why it was such a big deal.

Here's Drew sulking after I sent him to his room the second time. He kept scooting closer and closer to the hallway, making sure he was still technically in his room. I've decided one of the most difficult things about parenting is keeping a straight face while doling out discipline. Really, I just wanted to bust out laughing.

Another instance of the craziness happened this afternoon when I was getting ready for my soccer game. I was brushing my teeth when I heard Owen screech, "Give it back, Drewbie!" I looked in on them to see what Drew had taken. Neither kid had anything in their hands. I told Drew, "If you took something from Owen you need to give it back." He made a motion with his hand like he was giving Owen something. Owen made a motion with his hand like he was taking something from Drew. He then put his hand up to his ear and said, "Hello, Grandpa. Drew took my phone." Those crazy kids were fighting over an imaginary phone! What will be next?!

The Best Ab Workout Ever

I meant to write a post earlier in the week, but it never happened. It's been sorta busy around here. We started our Fall soccer season, and we had two games last week. We won the first game, but lost the second. I have shin splints for the first time in a long time; I'm not used to sprinting.

Yesterday David and I went to Boise to see Jim Gaffigan. It was so much fun! We laughed so hard the first five minutes of the show that we actually thought, "He'd better slow it down; there's no way I can handle laughing like this for an hour and a half." He was just talking about bowling. Who knew there was so much humor in bowling? David noticed that the lady sitting next to him didn't laugh the entire show. I wonder what was wrong with her? I noticed that the usher was laughing uncontrollably. I would love to be an usher for events like this. The show was totally worth the ticket price, but getting paid to see such hilarity would be even better.

So now I'm hooked on comedy shows. I've seen tons of them on TV; I usually record my favorite artists on Comedy Central. But seeing them live is so much better. We didn't stick around for the meet-and-greet after the show; I kind of wish we had, but the rest of our party didn't really want to. It was okay, though. I'm sure I'll be seeing Jim Gaffigan the next time he comes to our area, and I'll stick around to meet him at that show.

So what else is new?

*Samantha's birthday is Wednesday. I can't believe she'll be one already! This year has zoomed by! She is getting more talkative. She babbles a lot, and yells her gibberish at Drew and Owen. She has a few "words" too:

• Aya (hello. She puts the phone to her ear and says, "Aya," and then she giggles. It's so cute)
• Mum (more or milk. She does a bit of sign language so I know which one she means)
• Ee-oo (thank you. I handed her a cracker one day and she said, "Ee-oo" in the same tone of voice that I say "thank you" when she gives me whatever tiny item she's trying to put in her mouth)

*Drew has become increasingly interested in bodily functions. He burped the other day, but didn't know it was called a burp. He laughed and said, "I fart out my mouth." It was so gross, but I couldn't stop laughing.

*Owen has become the tantrum-thrower of the family. Drew's tantrums have mostly stopped--they're fewer and further between, in any case. But Owen has suddenly become very high-strung and takes everything personally. Today, when we were at our friends' house, he asked me for a brownie. He'd already had one, and I think he knew I was going to say "No" because he started crying even before he asked.

*David is going to start Engineer training at the railroad. He'll have a week of training in Pocatello, then two weeks in Salt Lake. Then he'll be a "Fireman," which is a railroad term for "Engineer in Training," for six months. He'll take a pretty big pay cut for those six months, but it won't be too bad, and after the six months he'll get a nice fat raise and have a little bit more seniority. That'll be nice, because work at the railroad is expected to be slow for the next couple years and when things are slow, the guys at the bottom of the proverbial totem pole get laid off. It's not like a typical job where if you're laid off you're done; they keep you as an employee, but you don't work and you don't get paid until business picks up again. So it makes it hard to find a different, decent, can-provide-for-the-family job when you can't tell your potential employer how long you expect to be there; it could be two weeks or two months, or longer.

So that's about all we're up to. Not a ton, but it keeps things busy enough for us.

Miscellany

I've been keeping myself a little busy lately, but none of it is really blog-worthy; it's all sort of boring. Things like dishes, errands,* and things that aren't boring, but still not really blog-worthy. Like, football** and Fantasy Football.***

I've been thinking about costume ideas for Halloween. I realize I have over a month and a half, but I want to make our costumes again this year, and I want to have plenty of time to make them nice (and not have to buy a Christmas shirt and turn it inside-out because all the other black shirts are sold-out). I got the stuff for Samantha's costume today; she'll be a pumpkin. It's not incredibly original, but they look so cute. I'm not going to make a hat for her, though. I'll just make her a "stem" and some leaves out of ribbon and clip it to her or put it on a headband.

For my boys I had some costume ideas that David shot down, but I'll probably do them anyway, 'cause they're hilarious. One idea is Gum Stuck on a Shoe. I would dress the kid up all in pink (or some more "manly" bubble gum color), then stick a shoe on his head. I would actually make a hat shaped like a shoe, so it would be slightly bigger in relation to the toddler-size wad of "gum." The other idea is Floor of a Movie Theater. I would dress the kid all in black and put bits of popcorn, smooshed-up candies, chewed up gum (I would probably use Silly Putty to make it less gross), candy wrappers and random sticky stuff (to emulate spilled soda) all over the clothes.

For myself, I will dress up as a Substitute Teacher. I'll put a "kick me" note on my back, make my hair look slightly disheveled, wear my glasses slightly askew, put a paper airplane in my hair, put a run in my nylons... Stuff like that. I only wish I had thought these up myself. I actually found them on some website. This other website has a lot of good ideas, too, and I might end up using the pizza costume or the airplane costume. And the Recycled Costume cracks me up (I don't have enough other costumes stocked up for it, though)! But I really like the other ideas. They're just so silly. And they jive with my Halloween Rules.****

We invited ourselves to go rock climbing this evening with some friends from church and they accepted! They go almost every week and have been saying all summer, "We should get together sometime." So we finally said, "How 'bout Monday?" And it was agreed. It was so fun! I had been bitten by the climbing bug the summer before my mission, and went quite often. But that was six years ago, and I hadn't been since. I think the bug got me again. I wish we'd gotten together earlier in the season, but I think there will still be some good climbing weather left before it gets too cold. The other day I told David, "If you ever want to get me a present and don't know what to get, I want a such-and such." I have no idea what it was I asked him for, because now all I can think of are rock climbing shoes.

Left: David on his way down from the top of the rock. Right: I'm demonstrating the most effective maneuver for getting down the rock wall. It's hard to tell, but I'm actually standing on just one foot. In the blue shirt is my new friend Sarah. We just met her this evening for the first time. In the white shirt is our friend Amy, whose family has been climbing for a couple years. Their kids are really good and were giving all kinds of pointers to David and me.

*Errands can be fun, sometimes, like when an old man at the store asks, "Are these boys twins?" And then he chats with them and calls them "Beautiful children." But not today. Drew threw a tantrum in the grocery store because I wouldn't let him ride under the cart. He barely fits, and he kept dragging his feet so they got ran over. I got sick of it and made him sit in the cart and he cried like I was beating him.

**Football is fun, but after four years of watching every televised game of every season, I still don't know how to watch it. I'm always amazed when David says, "There's a penalty," and two seconds later the referee throws a flag and calls the penalty. Meanwhile, I'm still watching the guy who was only pretending to run with the ball so the guy who actually had the ball could get through. Those play-action fakes get me every time.

***I joined David's fantasy football league. I think I'm in last place. But it's only been one week, and some of my players will get better throughout the season. I mostly have David set things up for me, as far as who to start and who to bench. I thought he was taking care of me, but then he went behind my back and drafted my favorite player for his own team! The audacity!

****I have this crazy notion that Halloween costumes have to be either Halloween related (ghosties and ghoulies and the like) or just zany (foodstuffs, funny people, et cetera). Animals are okay. I don't go for Disney characters. I wasn't always like this; I just came up with these "rules" last year. Eventually, though, I'll just have to let my kids pick what they want to dress up as. I'm not too worried about Drew and Owen, but I really don't want Samantha dressing in any of the skanky costumes that are so popular. I went to the costume shop today, and they had them in teen sizes! They're making them for younger and younger girls. I just hope and pray that Bratz and Hannah Montana are out of popularity when Samantha gets a little older. 'Cause no one likes to say "no" to their kid, but I totally will if she asks for any of that garbage.

My Three (And A Half) Year Plan

I did it. I applied for Idaho State University. I'm so nervous! I'm fairly certain I'll be accepted since I had good grades at Utah State and Utah Valley, but I'm nervous about keeping my grades up now that I have four distractions in my life (they are called David, Drew, Owen and Samantha).

I'm also nervous because my schedule is going to be the toughest I've ever had. I have to knock out two Chemistry classes, four Biology classes plus two labs to go with them, Math, Psychology, Communication (strangely enough, this Speech class is offered online...), and one or two Nutrition classes. The goal is to be finished with, or at least wrapping up, these classes by Spring of '10 so I can apply for the Dental Hygiene program. It'll take me four semesters, but I'll take a summer semester so I can be finished in just over a [calendar] year from when I start. It might mean a couple 18-credit semesters, which will be a big adjustment for me.

The last thing I'm nervous about is actually getting accepted to the program. Only about a third of the students who apply get accepted. But I'm going to study hard to make sure I'm one of them! Once I get all the prerequisites out of the way, it'll be just two years of Dental Hygiene courses and training, then I'll be ready to make money! I mean, uh, to help people take care of their teeth!

Rock Star Bangs

I finally got my hair cut again. The last time I had it cut was last January, when I had it all chopped off. It was a great cut because as it grew out it stayed looking decent (most of the time, anyway--there were a few mullet-y moments). But waiting eight months for a haircut it just a little too much.

Here's the original cut in January:

Here's a fairly recent photo:

And here's my new 'do:

I'm especially pleased with my haircut because David likes it. Usually when I get my hair cut he says, "It's nice, but I liked your hair better long." This hairdo isn't long, but he likes it anyway. Hooray!