Armpits! And Other Stuff

Drew was missing this morning. I thought I heard him downstairs but when I looked, he wasn't there. So I checked upstairs. I found him in my bathroom, brushing his teeth with his dad's toothbrush. I grabbed him and said, "This stuff is off limits. Let's go downstairs." He grudgingly complied, and on the way out the door yelled, "Armpits!" As is not uncommon, I had no idea what he was talking about. I just thought he was naming random body parts. He asked me to carry him downstairs, so I did. He smelled a little funny. After I got him downstairs, I went back and did a little sleuthing around/damage control in my bathroom and discovered David's deodorant sitting on the counter without the lid on. It didn't take me long from there to put all the pieces together. Drew had put on his dad's deodorant. I had no idea he was so hygiene conscious. Hope it's a trait that sticks.

A cousin on David's side has twins. Her boys are ten months old or so. We told her we were going to send her Drew and Owen's old coats to save her some money. The coats are in really good shape, except for the zipper on one coat broke. I thought, "No problem. I can just replace the zipper. Easy-peasy." Well, I unpicked the stitching and took the broken zipper off, only slightly damaging a minor piece of fabric in the process. I got a new zipper but discovered as I went to sew it on, that it didn't separate at the bottom. Ok, whatever. I just went to the store and got another zipper, making sure to get the right one this time. I started sewing the zipper. Something was wrong. I realised that I had forgotten to adjust the stitch length. But there was more than that. I felt like I was in over my head. I just couldn't bring myself to keep trying, feeling I really lacked the skills to do it right. So I decided to take the coat to a place that does alterations and repairs on clothing. I wasn't sure how much it would cost, and I got really worried when I saw the following sign:

Prices per Hour:

$50.00
If we do it for you.

$100.00
If you watch us do it.

$125.00
If you help.

$150.00
If you tried to do it yourself and couldn’t.

Luckily, it was just a "cutesy" little gimmick. Cause the coat I handed to the gal at the shop was in bad shape after I had tried to fix it myself and couldn't. In reality, it will only cost me about 12 bucks to get the coat fixed. Unfortunately, it won't be ready in time for us to ship it for her (her kiddos are getting cold!), so I think we're just going to get her a new coat and give her the other old one. Kind of a Christmas present.

Everything Is Exciting All the Time!

We received a Christmas card and letter from my brother and his family. It totally made my day. I was just rereading it as I sipped my Powerade (can't seem to kick that habit; but I guess it's not the worst thing I could be drinking), and I love the part where my niece tells her dad, "Oh, Dad! Everything's exciting all the time!" I can just picture her cute little face glowing as she says that. And it pretty much mirrors how things have been going for me. Especially during the holidays.

There are so many exciting secrets to be kept! David got me some stuff and had my sister in law wrap it (he "doesn't know how," even though I show him every year). He hasn't put any of it under the tree yet, the bag of gifts is just sitting here next to the computer, taunting me. But that's not even the most exciting part. I'm excited for people to open what I got them; I know they're just going to love it*!

I was getting all my "Santa" stuff ready for the kids. I don't think they're old enough to understand, even though they know Santa when they see him. But I got so giddy wrapping their little presents (well, we actually just got them one big one to share--another bonus of their youth; they don't expect presents, they're just grateful to get them). I also got giddy wrapping the present I (I mean, Santa) got for our family. It's a board game, which David found out despite my attempts to keep it hidden, but he doesn't know which one.

We also try to do something for Secret Santa every year; this year we were able to get a car seat for a little 1 month old. It's not much compared to all the people out there who need help, but hopefully it makes a difference for that family. It broke my heart when I saw the tag for the baby that needs a car seat. I can't imagine not having enough for the absolute essentials. So that was the one we chose. I don't say this to toot my own horn or anything. It's just important for me to be able to do something for someone else because so many people did things for my family during my growing up years that made our Christmases brighter, and now I'm in a position to pay it forward, so to speak. I'm grateful that it's something that David considers important, too.

I'm looking forward to all the relatives coming to visit, too. My sister is coming on Friday, and my sister in law is coming on Sunday, and we're having a dinner party on Monday, and it's gonna be great! It's too much excitement! I think it's what's been keeping me awake so late these days. But I love it!

*My dear, dear father in law loves to get presents for people, but he'll never ask what you want, and even if you tell him, he still probably won't get it for you. I don't always ask what people want, because I try to get things for people based on what they've told me previously that they like. That way, they're still surprised. I don't know what the basis is for some of the things I've received from my in-laws. There's a running joke in the family that stems from a few instances where he bought a gift for someone well in advance of the occasion and said, "I got your birthday [or whatever occasion] present for you. You're gonna love it!" The only thing is, he's usually kind of wrong. Though, to be fair, though I didn't love the apron-with-grill-tools they gave me for my birthday, it will come in handy. So now when we get surprise gifts for each other we'll say, "I got your present. You're gonna love it!" It keeps things suspenseful; will I love it?...

Letter to Santa from Mom

I found this last year at Christmastime, and I actually posted it on our family website, so sorry all you relatives who've already read it. But it continues to crack me up, so I decided to post it here (I couldn't find a way to post a link to it or anything, so here it is on it's own):

A Letter to Santa from Mom

Dear Santa, I've been a good mom all year. I've fed, cleaned, and cuddled my two children on demand, visited the doctor's office more than my doctor, sold sixty-two cases of candy bars to raise money to plant a shade tree on the school playground and figured out how to attach nine patches onto my daughter's girl scout sash with staples and a glue gun.

I was hoping you could spread my list out over several Christmases, since I had to write this letter with my son's red crayon, on the back of a receipt in the laundry room between cycles, and who knows when I'll find anymore free time in the next 18 years.

Here are my Christmas wishes: I'd like a pair of legs that don't ache after a day of chasing kids (in any color, except purple, which I already have) and arms that don't flap in the breeze, but are strong enough to carry a screaming toddler out of the candy aisle in the grocery store. I'd also like a waist, since I lost mine somewhere in the seventh month of my last pregnancy.

If you're hauling big ticket items this year, I'd like a car with fingerprint resistant windows and a radio that only plays adult music; a television that doesn't broadcast any programs containing talking animals, and a refrigerator with a secret compartment behind the crisper where I can hide to talk on the phone.

On the practical side, I could use a talking daughter doll that says, "Yes, Mommy" to boost my parental confidence, along with one potty-trained toddler, two kids who don't fight, and three pairs of jeans that will zip all the way up without the use of power tools. I could also use a recording of Tibetan monks chanting, "Don't eat in the living room" and "Take your hands off your brother", because my voice seems to be just out of my children's hearing range and can only be heard by the dog.

And please don't forget the Playdoh Travel Pak, the hottest stocking stuffer this year for mothers of preschoolers. It comes in three fluorescent colors and is guaranteed to crumble on any carpet making the In-law's house seem just like mine.

If it's too late to find any of these products, I'd settle for enough time to brush my teeth and comb my hair in the same morning, or the luxury of eating food warmer than room temperature without it being served in a Styrofoam container. If you don't mind I could also use a few Christmas miracles to brighten the holiday season. Would it be too much trouble to declare ketchup a vegetable? It will clear my conscience immensely.

It would be helpful if you could coerce my children to help around the house without demanding payment as if they were the bosses of an organized crime family; or if my toddler didn't look so cute sneaking downstairs to eat contraband ice cream in his pajamas at midnight.

Well, Santa, the buzzer on the dryer is ringing and my son saw my feet under the laundry room door. I think he wants his crayon back. Have a safe trip and remember to leave your wet boots by the chimney and come in and dry off by the fire so you don't catch cold. Help yourself to cookies on the table, but don't eat too many or leave crumbs on the carpet.

Yours always.....Mom

PS: One more thing...you can cancel all my requests if you can keep my children young enough to believe in Santa.

~Author Unknown

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