Weekend

We've had a good weekend. Friday we drove down south to attend a friend's wedding luncheon and ring ceremony. He's the friend who introduced me to David (his name is also David. His bride's name is Marcy). I was thrilled when we got his announcement in the mail because he's dated a lot of crazy girls and has wanted to get married for a long time and he finally found that special someone who treats him well and isn't weird. She's in fact very nice and really pretty, and all-around sweet. Drew and Owen were of course excited for the trip, even though they had no clue who David and Marcy were. At random intervals of the trip Drew would exclaim, "I'm so excited to see Marvid and Carcy!" Close enough.

The ring ceremony was something new to me, that I thought was cute and sweet. Dave and Marcy were married in the Mount Timpanogos LDS temple, and a lot of their relatives weren't able to attend. So before the luncheon, they had a guy give a little talk about marriage, then they each read the inscriptions on their rings. They had gotten each others' rings inscribed in Hungarian, which Dave was able to translate (he served a mission in Hungary). Dave had inscribed on Marcy's band something like, "I'll love you forever," and she had inscribed on his, "Love you lots, Stallion!" They exchanged rings and kissed, then we all went inside the reception hall to eat.

Drew and Owen's favorite part of the trip was when we went to Cousin Heidi's house. They got to get out of the car and run around for a few hours and play with all the second cousins. They're still talking about riding the tractor on the driveway (a Little Tikes tractor), and playing in the dirt (the sandbox). It would have been even more fun (for me anyway) if Owen hadn't decided to change his own poopy diaper on the living room floor. It got in his hair, but luckily not on the carpet. And I think everyone (except him) wishes he hadn't dumped sand in the bubble jug and then dumped the bubbles all over the lawn. *sigh.* Next time we visit we'll bring you some bubbles, Heidi!

Samantha had a good time, too. She got to play with little Katie, who is really close in age, for a few minutes. They smiled at each other and swapped pacifiers and poked each other in the eyes. It was cute to watch.

I wish we'd had more time at Heidi's. We decided to drive back to Pocatello that night (only a three hour drive), thinking we'd go camping somewhere on Saturday. But when Saturday rolled around we were so tired. We slept in, which was a mistake because it gave Drew and Owen all kinds of time to totally thrash their room. We were greeted with Balmex and Coppertone all over the place. It smelled like a rash at the beach. It created tons of laundry to do and lots of furniture walls and other general stuff to de-grease. While I was in what's-up-with-these-messes-they're-driving-me-crazy mode, I got my kitchen and living room cleaned. Tomorrow I'll have to clean the main-floor bathroom, which the boys have also been thrashing. Why are they such Destructos? Will they ever grow out of it? A faint hope that they will is all that keeps me going sometimes.

This is somewhat off the subject, but something that I think about often, especially while I'm cleaning up the likes of yesterday's mess. I feel like I'm really hard on my kids sometimes. I'm super stern, and I scold them and yell at them when they're misbehaving. I sometimes even swat their behinds when they tell me "No" after I ask them to do something.

Various relatives say things like, "They're not really misbehaving, they're just exploring" (makes me wonder if the people saying this forgot that they ever had kids). And I can see that in certain cases, like the first time Drew plucked a leaf off my friend's houseplant, for example. He just wanted to see what it was and that was fine, but then I told him, "Drew, we don't pick leaves off of plants. We leave them on so the plant can grow and so we can enjoy it." I dragged him away, but soon he walked back over and plucked another leaf. Probably my explanation was too long and wordy and didn't register in his brain. So I said, "Drew. No. No more leaves off that plant." And once again pulled him away. The next time he looked at me and as I glared at him, saying, "Don't do it..." he smirked his little rebel smirk and plucked another leaf. This is when I swat his behind and sit him in the corner (if we'd been at my house, I'd put him in his room) because that is what I consider misbehavior, rebellion, obstinacy, whatever. He knows what I expect and he does the opposite.

I guess the inner dilemma I face every day is, should I be letting things slide more often? I get tired of saying "no" all the time. I've tried other tactics like distraction, telling them what they actually can do, time out, yelling, sending them to their room, all kinds of stuff. It feels like we're getting nowhere and I sometimes feel like maybe they just don't understand. But then I think, by the time they do understand, maybe it will be too late to train them and discipline them, so I should just keep going on this track and hope the lessons eventually sink in.

I don't really have any conclusions to draw from all of this. I just mull this stuff over in my mind so many times a day (like, every time a kid goes to his room for throwing a toy, biting a sibling, putting a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in a cup of water and dumping said cup on the floor, et al). Here's my inspiration for the day: "...never be weary of good works, but [be] meek and lowly in heart; for such shall find rest to their souls" (Alma 37:34).